As a standard knee-jerk reaction, teachers unions will now probably insist that all their members who selfishly volunteer to be first aiders (at the insistance of 'couldn't give a f*ck until it's likely to be someone else's fault' parents) are issued with a pair of X-ray specs which have only ever been available in the back of comics from the 1950s.
According to one anonymous source, "How the hell are we supposed to tell if some klutz has broken their arm if we, as professional educators, aren't allowed to slice them open and perform explorative surgery or have a really big X-ray machine that even the hospitals can't afford?"
Another added "I'm not allowed to be a first aider as my union considers it an extra curriculum activity and outside the scope of my union membership as a teacher, therefore they wouldn't support me if I failed to diagnose something even if I wasn't humanly capable of it, especially if it was on a union negociated break period. I want to help out but my hands are tied and I don't want to get sued."
A Government official pointed out "By buying equipment from comics in the 1950s we have ensured that the purchase has not been subject to the extorionate price rises which have occurred over the last 30 years.
A teachers union official said something but it sounded like a bunch of b*llocks so we didn't bother listening.
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